Cyberbullying - The I The “I Hate Tricia” Campaign

The Incident

Tricia is a 15 year old sophomore at a regional high school. She has a small circle of friends, but is not one of the ‘in crowd’. After turning down a date with Zack, one of the football players, Tricia becomes the subject of gossip about her supposed sexual promiscuity.

At home one night, she gets an anonymous message via instant messenger with a link to a web page and a note that she’ll find it interesting. The link is to a profile on a dating web site that features an unflattering picture of her just stepping out of the shower in the school gym.

The profile includes veiled and open sexual solicitation, and her email address and cell phone number. In addition, the picture has been entered into the web site’s ‘hot or not’ picture rating system that allows users to vote and comment on posted photos. Beneath her photo are numerous insulting comments, each supposedly from a different person. Embarrassed and angry, Tricia tries to respond to the instant message but the system tells her that the user has gone offline.

At school the next day, Tricia feels that everyone is looking at her and laughing, but tries to tell herself that no one else saw the website. She can no longer pretend, however, when she walks into the library and finds three freshmen boys snickering in the corner as they read the comments entered on the profile. For the rest of the day, Tricia is teased and taunted in the hallways. Boys she doesn’t know openly make comments about her nude picture, and girls pointedly call her names under their breath as they pass her.

Tricia’s Reaction

By the end of the day, she has already decided that she can’t come back to school in the morning. At home, it’s even worse. Her mailbox is full of emails from strangers making lewd suggestions. After the first three, Tricia just deletes them all, but it doesn’t make the embarrassment go away.

In the morning, she tells her mother she has a headache and can’t go to school. Since Tricia seldom misses school, her mother agrees, but is concerned. Tricia snaps at her mother that she’s just sick, leave her alone, and retreats to her room where she spends the rest of the day. By noontime, she has turned off her cell phone rather than deal with the barrage of messages from strangers. When Tricia refuses to go to school for a second day, Tricia’s mother presses her for a reason and Tricia stonily insists that nothing is wrong except her headache and again retreats to her room.

The Process

When Tricia misses school for a second day in a row, one of her friends decides that enough is enough. Diane asks to meet with a guidance counselor, and shows her the web site page. She tells the counselor that she is sure that Tricia didn’t post it herself, and thinks that’s the reason that Tricia is staying away from school. The counselor thanks Diane for coming forward, tells her that she did the right thing, and assures her that no one will know that she is the one that made the report.

The guidance counselor calls Tricia’s mother and explains what she has learned. She offers to come to the house to talk with Tricia and her parents about the situation and ways to handle it. Tricia’s mother gratefully accepts the offer and the meeting time is set. Tricia is not as happy about being revealed, but when both adults express sympathy and support her feelings of outrage and hurt, as well as offer practical advice and solutions, she agrees to cooperate. This time, with two supportive adults present, Tricia checks her messages and emails – and saves them rather than deleting them in embarrassment.

With the backing of the school department, Tricia’s parents write to the owner of the dating web site, explain the situation frankly and ask that the profile be removed immediately from the web site. Further, they request that the web site owners furnish any identifying information on the person who posted the profile, and state that if that information is not forthcoming, they will pursue legal action against the site owner for endangerment of a minor. Faced with the threat of legal action, the web site owner responds with the IP address from which the profile had been posted.

In the meantime, back at the school, the web site is blocked, and an announcement is made that the incident of harassment is being taken seriously by the school, and that the IP address obtained by Tricia’s parents will be traced by police investigators if necessary.

The Resolution

The school’s anti-bullying policy includes a peer support component, and Tricia meets with a peer support counselor before returning to school. The other girl not only offers Tricia validation for her feelings, but some concrete strategies to deal with any unkind remarks or actions. When Tricia does return to school, the peer support group and her own friends create a ‘buffer zone’ of support around her. Instead of the taunting that she had expected, Tricia is approached by both girls and boys who express anger at what happened to her and the hope that they catch the person who did it.

With the IP address obtained from the dating site, Tricia’s parents determine the internet service provider, and contact their abuse department with a brief summary of the situation.

With the evidence provided, including several of the emails that Tricia had saved, the ISP contacts the owner of the account using that IP address and suspends their service – which is how Zack’s parents find out about his actions. Faced with the evidence of Zack’s actions, and the possible repercussions, Zack’s parents enroll him in counseling, where they are encouraged to seek group counseling for the entire family.