Summer Camp Bullies

For some children, summer camp is a marvelous experience where they learn new skills, get to do things that aren’t usually available to them, and build confidence in their own abilities to survive in a world without their parents. From the distance of adulthood, many of us have an idealized vision of a world that consists of hiking, swimming and playing games, ending with a nightly sing-along around the campfire before bed. It’s an idyllic world of no school, no responsibilities and no worries.

Unfortunately, for some children summer camp is just one more place where there lives are made miserable by bullies. Away from the safety of familiar adults and protective surroundings, children who are bullied may feel completely cut off from any source of help. At home, a victim of bullying has safety zones – his own home, for instance, or a private place where no one will bother him. He may already be feeling homesick, and have no access to the people to whom he’d usually turn. Removed from his familiar surroundings, the victim of bullying at summer camp may feel far more isolated and alone than he would had the same behaviors happened at home.

At the same time, summer camp may provide a unique opportunity to break the cycle of bullying and instill positive behaviors in its place. As early as 1929, a multi-year study about camping found that with appropriate staff modeling and interaction, children at summer camp showed a decrease in bullying behavior and an increase in what the researchers called ‘pro-social’ behaviors – actions like reaching out to befriend an unlikable child or speaking up to disagree with popular opinion.¹

Preparing Your Child for Camp

Statistics that identify bullying specifically at summer camp are hard to come by, but the prevalence of popular literature, movies and television shows that are based on bullying that happens at summer camp is telling. If your child will be attending summer camp, there are a number of things that you can do to ensure that his holiday is safe and bully-free.

1.  

   1. Ask about the camp’s policy with regards to bullying. Make sure that there is a firm policy that defines bullying, and lays out how bullying incidents will be treated. The camp policy should include training for all counselors and workers in how to recognize, prevent and intervene in bullying behaviors and incidents.

   2. If you haven’t already talked to your child about bullying, do it now. Talk about names that hurt, and physical actions that hurt. Do it in such a way that you don’t raise fears and dread in your child about going to camp – that anxiousness can backfire and make your child a more attractive target.

   3. Give your child concrete tools that he or she can use if he does become the target of a bully, or witnesses bullying. Talk about why other kids bully, and how bystanders can become heroes by speaking up.

   4. Make sure that they understand the difference between ‘tattling’ and ‘reporting’ – Tattling is done to get someone in trouble. Reporting is done to help someone out of trouble. TELLING is the single most important thing that a victim or bystander can do to stop bullying behavior.

Risk Management – Bully Control at Camp

Camp directors and staff have the same responsibilities to campers that schools do to their students. Those responsibilities include providing a safe experience for all of their campers. Bullying erodes that safety by putting children in danger, both emotionally and physically. Protecting children from bullies is just as important as protecting them from accidental injuries. In fact, many risk management companies and insurance companies now require that camps have an anti-bullying policy in place and enforced as part of the conditions of insurance.

Staff is the single most important factor in managing the risk of bullying at summer camp. Because of this, camp directors need to be doubly sure that they hire the right people to work with children at camp. Obviously, there are more risks involved in summer camp than the possibility of bullying, but attitudes toward bullying should definitely be part of the interview process for camp counselors. Minimizing the risk of bullying at camp means:

• Careful Camp Staff Screening

Background checks are not enough. Personal interviews are the best way to determine the ‘people’ skills of prospective staff. If it’s impractical to personally interview all counselors before the summer begins, a written essay can be a good way to gauge possible attitudes regarding bullying and other sensitive topics.

• Counselor and Staff Training

The single most effective way to head off bullying at camp is to train every single member of the camp staff to recognize and counteract bullying behavior the moment that they see it. Just like schools, camps should require all counselors, team leaders, instructors, administrators and other staff to attend a planned bullying intervention training before camp starts for the summer. At that training, presenters can stress the importance of providing positive role models and preventing bullying from ruining anyone’s summer and offer effective strategies to help counselors – most of them teens themselves – put a stop to bullying before it becomes a problem.

• Supervision

Supervisors are the key to effective bully prevention. They need to understand that the safety, both physical and emotional, of all campers is in their hands. In addition to training them to spot bullying, they also need to be trained in effective management techniques. This can be especially sensitive with camp counselors and supervisors, many of whom are young people themselves and uncertain in a leadership role. By being a role model for effective management, you can help them model appropriate behavior for their staff and counselors.

Tips for Camp Counselors

If you are a camp counselor, there are ways you can help make the summer a good one for your entire bunk or team. Making sure that there is no bullying is one of the more important ones. These are some tips to help you keep bullying from becoming a problem in your group.

1. Remember that you have authority over the campers. Even though you may only be a year or two older, what you do while they’re in your charge will have as much impact on them as if you were a teacher.

2. Set things out from the beginning. Right from the start of camp, discuss and set up a ‘Code of Conduct’ for all campers in your cabin.

3. Make sure that campers know that bullying is unacceptable behavior.

4. Do not play favorites with your campers. Kids do notice – and while some might feel excluded, other may use it as a thing to bully another about.

5. Keep your eye out for potential bullying victims. Those who are annoying, cry easily or are ‘different’ are typical victims.

6. If you think a child in your cabin needs some extra help with social skills – whether because he’s a bully or a victim – discuss what you can do with senior staff. They may have some ideas for you.

7. Let kids know that they will be safe when they report bullying. Under no circumstances reveal who it was that ‘ratted everyone out’.

8. Be a good role model for your campers. If they see YOU bullying, they’ll think it’s all right.

9. By the same token, be a good role model for bullying intervention as well. Step in immediately and calmly when you see a bullying situation. Do not react with anger, or attempt to shame. Simply state ‘The name calling stops this instant. It’s against our bunk rules.’

10. Trust your instincts. If something ‘feels’ like bullying, there’s a good chance it is.

Tips For Campers

Being bullied at camp can be even more frightening and upsetting than it is at home, but you don’t have to take being picked on, teased or made fun of. As a camper, you have a right to expect a safe environment, and that means emotionally safe as well as physically safe. There are some things you can do to help keep bullying from ruining your – or anyone else’s – summer camp experience.

1. Remember that it is NOT YOUR FAULT. If you are being picked on by one or more other campers, it is not your fault. They are the ones with the problem, not you.

2. Before you go to camp, spend some time practicing your ‘confident look’. Bullies pick on kids that they think won’t defend themselves, or who will be bothered by name-calling or hitting. Walk tall, and look confident.

3. While you’re practicing, get your mom or a friend to help you practice talking back to bullies assertively. Remember, bullies pick on kids who show that they’re bothered – and kids who fight back. The best thing you can do is show that you don’t care what they say by walking away.

4. Some things that you can say to bullies who try to make fun of you are, “Cut it out,” “Yep, you’re right” or “Leave me alone.”

5. If you decide to try to make a joke, make one that doesn’t make the bully look foolish. Some of them will just take it as a challenge.

6. The single most important rule is to TELL SOMEONE that can help. It can be your camp counselor, the nurse, or even your parents. If you are being targeted for bullying, no one can help you if they don’t know what’s going on.

7. If the person you ask for help tells you “Just don’t let it bother you” or “Ignore them and they’ll stop”, tell someone else. You do not have to deal with bullying by yourself.

8. Telling on a bully is not ‘tattling’. Bullies count on people not telling. If you know that someone is being picked on or hurt, you have a responsibility to tell someone. If you’re afraid of repercussions, or feel wrong telling ON someone, then tell FOR someone.